Ladylike
Laws: Holiday Gift Giving – By Lauren
Conrad on December 7th, 2011
Gift
giving can be a sticky subject. How much should you spend? Do you give your
boss a present? Is re-gifting okay? How do you handle unexpected gifts? These
are common questions many of us may find ourselves asking each holiday season.
Fortunately, there are some clear-cut rules when it comes to giving gifts…
How
much should I spend?
First off, forget stressing over giving people things that have the same
monetary value of what they gave you. Instead, figure out the nicest thing you
can afford within your means. The best way to figure this out is to make a list
of everyone you want to give a gift to. Then determine how much you can (not
want) to spend on each person. Having a budget will keep your holiday spending
in perspective. Gift giving is about being thoughtful and showing appreciation,
it’s not about going into debt.
Who
should I give gifts to? Give presents to the people you want to show your appreciation
to such as family and close friends. If you are part of a big group and don’t
want to leave anyone out, arrange a gift exchange or plan a Secret Santa with a
price point that works for everyone ($10 to $25) is most appropriate). As for
people who celebrate different holidays, it’s totally okay to give them a
present so long as it isn’t anything religious.
What’s
the present protocol for work? According to co-author of the 18th Edition
of Emily Post’s Etiquette, Lizzie Post, the one person you really shouldn’t
give a gift to is your boss. “When you’re in a work environment, and there is a
team of people working together, if you give your boss a gift it can often come
across as trying to buy good favor.” However if you work at a company with 10
people and want to give something to your boss, Post suggests making it a group
effort. That way it doesn’t come across as though you’re fishing for brownie
points. If you happen to be close friends with your boss, keep it personal and
give him or her a gift outside of the office. As for co-workers, Post says to “tread
carefully”. While there will inevitably be people you are close to, try not to
show favoritism. If you have a personal relationship with someone outside of
the office, Post advises to give him or her a gift somewhere other than work.
Otherwise, if you give one person a card, give everyone a card. Another idea is
bring in a treat for the entire office to share. (Check out my Recipe Box for
ideas!) Communal gifts that can be shared are ideal.
To
re-gift or not to re-gift? Opt for not. Not only is re-gifting dishonest, you will most
likely get caught (or be paranoid about getting caught). Re-gifting entirely
defeats the purpose of gift giving. Gifts are meant to be a reflection of your
gratitude for someone-something that has been thoughtfully selected by you for
someone you care about. Re-gifting is both thoughtless and wrong. If you’re
strapped for cash, make the gift instead. DIY gifts are from the heart and the
recipient will surely appreciate it far more than a random store-bought
present.
How
do I handle unexpected gifts? If someone gives you a present out of the blue, you
are not required to reciprocate. Instead of scrambling for an excuse as to why
you do not have a gift for them, graciously accept the gift and say thank you.
Stammering for an explanation will only make things worse. And besides, you
shouldn’t feel compelled to give just because you received.
Are
gift cards and gift receipts okay? Yes! Gift cards are actually very thoughtful
since you need to consider the recipient’s interests. And it’s much better than
giving someone cash, which many consider gauche. As for gift receipts, it’s
always a good idea to include them. It tells the recipient you understand
if they don’t like the gift and it’s
okay for them to return it in exchange for something they really love.
I
hope you found today’s Ladylike Laws post helpful! I’ll be doing a follow up
blog about the major no-no gifts next week.
What’s
the strangest gift you’ve ever received?
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